competition????

Up until today my longest run has been 4 miles.  But I am following a new schedule towards running a marathon, so today I increased my longest run to 6 miles.  This morning I set out to run those 6 miles on the Colombian Trail from High Bridge.  I had a goal of running a slow 12 to 13 minute mile average for the 6 miles.  The first mile I was slow, 15 minutes.  The second mile I was faster, 12 minutes.  I was not winded and could easily carry on a conversation.  Around the 1 1/2 mile mark I ran into a couple and their big dog.  I was hesitant to past them slowly, so I sprinted past them.  They laughed, but I ignored them. 

Soon after I passed by a woman running with water bottles attached to a belt around her waist.  I marveled at her; she must be running a great distance, and at such a pace!  Immediately after the woman passed me, the man from the couple, started running and ran past me.  He was coughing, hacking and breathing hard as he passed me.  I wondered if he was okay, but he ran on.  A mile later the woman with the water bottles around her passed me again, she held her thumbs up in the air and said "great job!" to me.  I smiled and thanked her.

I marveled at the beauty of the trail, especially when I got to the railroad bridge at the Ken Lockwood Gorge.  How many happy memories I have from years ago of camping, swimming..just having fun!

After crossing the bridge I soon reached the 3 mile mark on the trail, I turned around and headed back to High Bridge.  The scenery was breath taking, I was in heaven.  But then about 1 mile later I heard the huffing and puffing, coughing and hacking of the guy from the couple.  He passed me again, and I wondered if he enjoyed running.  He slowed down soon after passing me when he met up again with his partner who was walking with their big dog.  I finished the run right behind them. He kept looking back at me as though I was actually competition.  I laughed to myself, he was not my competition, I am my own competition.  I just want to be the best I can be.

I had such fun, and I was happy that I was able to run 6 miles!  Yeah!!!

I love to run.  God has given us certain abilities and I don't want to neglect the gifts that I have been given.  I so appreciate the fact that I can run.  Life is fragile, tomorrow I could lose this gift.  I never want to take it for granted.

Today was a great day!

lousy math+imagination=scared

Pictures of my favorite places to run!


Okay, if I run an average of 10 minute miles, then it will take me 4.36 hours to finish a marathon? If I run an average of 13 minute miles, then it will take me 5.67 hours? If I run a cool 15 minute mile average, then it will take me 6.55 hours to cross the finish line? If I run an average of 18 minutes a mile, then I will cross the finish line in 7.86 hours? If I fall and scratch my knee, or have tummy trouble, it could take me 10 hours....or even longer! But then again, I was never good at math, so I could be wrong.


I wonder, what is the record for the slowest marathon time? I probably have a chance at breaking that record. Someone has to be the slowest, there are much worse titles one could earn, right?


When I ran my 5K back in June, there was a young girl that started out in my "pace pack". She was excited to tell us that she came in dead last in the last 5K she entered. I asked how many 5K races she has completed and she said "Oh, about 10", adding that she usually comes in last or next to last. She smiled; she didn't mind being last because to her finishing the race was like winning. Yes, it was inspiring to know she had this incredible attitude, but I was determined to stay ahead of her, so I upped my pace(I panicked at the thought of finishing last). As it turned out she did not finish last, or even within the last few runners. I actually had goosebumps as I watched her cross the finish line. Her face glowing with a huge smile. That is when I realized that "last" can be the "best". I was really happy for her, she was doing what she loved and getting better at it. Now that's guts and determination; a true winner!


I am slowly reaching out and reading other blogs about running. I can see that my fears, worries and vivid imagination are much like other people who are taking that leap onto a new path towards achieving a new running goal.


I know I am slow, but I'm starting to grow and in my running it will show!

new goal

I have decided to set a new goal for myself. I now have a goal to run a marathon. I still have to choose which marathon I will run, but I have chosen my Trainer and training program. I have decided to follow Jill Bruyere and Yuri Elkaim's First Marathon Made Easy Program, with Jill Bruyere as my Trainer. I will follow their program and receive monthly coaching sessions from Jill.

I do have to say that I was very excited when I finally made my decision, but within a few hours I was feeling a little overwhelmed with the prospect of running 26.2 miles.

Just being able to run for 40 minutes plus straight, has given me such confidence. What I thought was impossible is achievable!

I hope you feel the same as I do, that life is full of possibilities! Yes, it has sadness and struggles, but it has so much joy! I am going to cling to the "joy" and run like hell with it!

Journey

I have been trying to increase my mileage over the past month. I am now up to 4 miles and I love it! I am still slow, but if I incorporate speed training I am sure my mileage will improve. The question is, do I want to incorporate speed training? I always hated it in the past and only did it because I felt I "had" to. But if I want to get faster, I need to train.
In life we have many choices to make, some are easy but many are not so easy. Sometimes things happen out of our control and we are faced with incredible hardships. Through it all we do have some control. Some times we are at fault for what happens, but sometimes we are the victims. No matter what, we still have choices, we can change our ways and we can overcome any hardship if we truly want to. Bad things happen all the time to everyone. Many bad things have happened in my life. Many of them were out of my control, but many were also my fault. We can't hold onto these events, just learn from them and move on. I cannot blame something that happened to me 40 years ago for a mistake that I made today. I have to take responsibility for my mistakes and learn from them. Life is a journey, it can be a joyful one, or it can be a miserable one, it is YOUR choice. I choose to think of my life as a joyful, exciting journey. Yes, I lost my precious son Tommy, but what a wonderful son, brother and grandson. He was a great blessing. I lost my husband after we remarried. I thought we would be together for 20 or 30 more years, but I was wrong. I wouldn't trade one moment of our time together. He was my partner, my love, my strength.
Will I incorporate speed training? Yes, I think I will, only because I have a goal of running faster. I believe we can accomplish any goal we set for ourselves. Life is a challenge, but the rewards are worth it! I don't want to walk away from any of life's challenges, there is just too much to be gained from them, too much to be learned!

AUGUST

I haven't written at all this month, but that doesn't mean I haven't kept up with my running. As a matter of fact, my running has been my life saver. Any time I can run, any time I can jump on my trail bike and ride, I grab the chance as if life itself depended on it! Running gives me freedom from the stresses of day to day living and it gives me the inspiration to move forward. I, like so many of my peers, have to watch over my mother's care and finances. This means that in order for her to be in a wonderful nursing home like Country Arch, I have to pay all of her expenses including her property taxes, property upkeep and any other bills she owes (such as credit cards) because all her income has to go to the nursing home. I have used up all my retirement savings , so now I have to wait to retire until I have a chance to rebuild my retirement account. I don't resent this because my mom was always there for me and I will be there for her. I love her; love means more than money!
It hurts that I am alone in caring for my mom.  But I will not abandon my mother at her time of need. She is a sweet lady and the best mom; I love her with all my heart!
Life is so precious..we never know when it will end. I intend to live it at its fullest...running, loving, caring and enjoying every second! But most of all I will be true to those I love in their time of need.

Abandonment

I ran this morning for 30 minutes with complete abandonment. I din't care where I ran or how fast I ran. I only knew that I was completely carefree and did not have any limits. I can say that this was an incredible time...no limits, no judgement. Just me and the joy of complete freedom!
I started this blog back in February and I feel I have lived a life-time since then. I had a goal of running 30 minutes straight...I have more than achieved that since I can not only run 30 minutes + on the treadmill but can run well over 30 minutes on the "road".
I have had some disappointments..I had a "relative" post some nasty, vindictive comments on my Facebook page. I was so hurt, but lies are lies and they never trump the truth! So I am okay now.
I miss my Tommy and I miss my Tom, but I feel they are still with me; they still are my guys.
Running has not only given me hope for my future, but peace with my past. I am moving forward...who knows what the future holds! I am excited..life really is a "happily ever after"...

Harmony

Yesterday and today I took a mountain bike ride on the Colombian Trail. I rode the 14 mile round trip distance both days. I cherish the beauty of the trail that runs where the old railroad tracks once existed. The trail takes you between High Bridge and Vernoy, running through the Ken Lockwood Gorge. The old, opened rail road bridge that we carefully crossed as children, is now a concrete cross way with tall fences on both sides to prevent one from falling into the Gorge. Every time I cross it I think of how we would put our ear to the track to "listen" for an on-coming train. I have so many wonderful memories of camping up over the bridge.

The day was extremely warm, but you couldn't feel it on the trail. There was a strong breeze flowing through the trees that shaded you from the glaring sun. Birds were singing and the butterflies were actively fluttering around. It was like being in heaven.

I run at Vorhees State Park during the work week at 6am in the morning. I feel the same joy and harmony with nature when I run. The picture above is the trail I run. It is in this area that I have seen a black bear. He is small and young, no more than 150lbs. He looks at me as if to say "Nice morning, isn't it?". We go about our business, respecting each other. I have no fear of him, or any of the other animals I may encounter during my runs or bike rides. I am often asked why I am not afraid and I say I am not afraid of the four legged beasts, but I am afraid of the "two legged beasts".

This week was a trying week for me. I am anxious about a photo shoot scheduled for this Tuesday..I am afraid that my "after shot" will look exactly like my "before" picture. Oh well, as my mom would say, "it is what it is". This week was also the week that I posted a comment on my Facebook page that was sincere and definitely not a secret to my family. Someone responded with nasty, vicious, vindictive and completely untrue comments. I was absolutely shocked. I posted my comment and went to bed, I woke up at around 5am to find the terrible lashing out. I was so hurt and embarrassed. But I will say that I will not be bullied and I will not be told what I can discuss with my friends. I will say what I feel and I will reach out to my friends because I so appreciate their suggestions and their support.

The black bear treated me with more respect than my own "relative". People have the capacity to be so vindictive, so cruel and they have the ability to be so kind and compassionate. I do believe that the vast majority of people are the kind and compassionate ones. But there are enough vindictive, cruel ones to keep me on guard. Maybe it is a result of being a social worker for so many years. I have seen the very best and the most depraved human conduct. I just never thought it would hit so close to home.

I choose to live in a world that is beautiful and balanced. Where everyone strives to treat each other with respect. I really believe that the vast majority of creatures on this earth do value each other and truly want to live in harmony.